Dan VS Florence
by FlowerofAdversity
Summary: A sequel to Dan Vs. Hortense, in which Dan and Florence get hitched at long last ! Dan still has a bit of a wandering eye for Hortense. Will Flo be enough to keep his eyes in his sockets and stay committed fully to her ? Rated T for mention of Dan's fantasies.


Dan Vs. Florence

Synopsis: After the 'up in the air ending' of Dan Vs. Hortense, I thought I would conclude with a sequel.

Chapter 1-Wedding Bells for Dan ?

Dan was practically _euphoric_ when he had gotten an affirmative answer to his proposition. He had been dating his little revolutionary for 2 1/2 years now and he felt now was an opportune time to tie the knot with her. After all, everyone else had been telling him he and Florence were 'attuned' and that they were probably each other's soul mates in their past lives (actually it was a _pyschic_ who had told them that when they were together at the local carnival taking down the grifting carnies that practically ran the place). In his secret heart, he knew he would be getting to see Hortense again.

At night he would often fantasize about being in the middle of Hortense and Flo, a perpetual 'sandwich of desire', he mused. He slapped himself, _hard_.

'Florence is the one you are marrying. You should put any notion of Hortense out of your mind. Besides, she's expecting her _first born_, after all.', he thought to himself, feeling slightly guilty. Still, the idea of a menage a trois was _extremely_ titilating as well as sexy. Knowing he would have absolutely no part in even entertaining that sort of temptation, Dan went to down a few cold tall glasses of water. Thankfully he had paid his electric bill or he would've been dying in the summer's heat. This year, the temperatures had been so torrid he was certain that the asphalt could be used as a poor man's Turkish bath.

It had been difficult to sleep even with the AC, and Mr. Mumbles spent most of his time cuddled close to Dan under the cover from the frigid breeze. Dan breathed deeply and counted his blessings. Fairly soon he would be a married man and any notions of even entertaining a relationship with Hortense would be a thing of the past. But at least he would be able to see Hortense during family reunions and admire her from afar. That wasn't against the rules, was it ?

Chapter 2-Guys Night Out

Once Chris had gotten wind of Dan's marriage to Flo, he was practically bursting with elation.

'Dude, I have to get you the best bachelor party around. Wedding will be here before you know it.', Chris said, formulating games the guys could play after the entertainment for the night had come to a close.

Scrounging together what money he had that would've been used for a trip to Doodly Woodly Fun Park for him and Elise later on in the summer but he figured with an overhaul of odd jobs he would be able to split the difference and the two of them could still make the trip together after Dan's wedding.

While coming home from work, Dan's home had been ambushed in an 'extreme make-over' as part of the surprise. At first, upon arriving home he thought it was the _other_ Dan, the one who had tried to steal his identity and ruin his existence. Thankfully this was no such occurance or he would've found his baseball bat to teach that insensitive d-bag a few things by threatening movements only. He would never actually _use_ a baseball bat unless he was actually in danger.

Chris and his friends yelled surprise a moment late upon seeing Dan walk in.

'Is this some kind of subterfuge ? I didn't give you permission to give my apartment a make over.', Dan said, slightly angered.

'Believe me, Florence will be happier that it looks so pristine now. Women tend to like their living space immaculate. You learn that very quickly.', Chris said, offering some pointers to his friend, the newlywed to be.

'Why else have you come here in the middle of the night ? I'm a bit beat. Long day of protests on the street with Flo, and gosh, were they romantic. Never saw revolts in quite that way until I met her.', Dan said, his eyes glowing with glee.

'Your bachelor party, dude ! The guys and I threw together what money we had and we're taking you out on the town tonight. Aw, yeah ! We're gonna paint this town maple leaf red !', Chris said, pumping his fist in the air vigorously. Knowing full well this was his final night of so called 'freedom', Dan went along with Chris' plan and contagious joyful attitude. Strangely, he didn't regret one moment of the entire evening.

After frequenting the casino and experiencing a saucy dance from some strippers dressed as cops, firemen, nurses and librarians, Dan took Chris home. Dan had drunk one too many Mountain Dews and had been bouncing off the walls the entire evening but now he was dead tired and Chris was fairly certain that not even World War III would rouse him from his sleep. Fortunately, Chris only had to pool 1/3rd of his vacation money into the casino, for he had won most of it back playing the one-armed bandits. This way, he wouldn't have to explain himself and maybe the trip to the amusement park would put him back in Elise's good graces after the argument the two had gotten into over where the next family reunion was to be held this Christmas.

Chapter 3-White Wedding

Dan had taken a melatonin to calm his nerves and help him sleep but the activities of last evening had worn him out enough that he almost didn't wake up in time for his wedding. He was driving in rush hour traffic with the classic song _Get Me To The Church On Time_ from My Fair Lady playing in his mind. Luckily he did, or Flo would've been immensely irate. He had never seen her truly mad but he didn't want to cross that line. Luckily, in this case he wouldn't have to.

Amongst the bridesmaids were women Flo knew as sisters and dear friends, including her cousin, Hortense. Dan felt his eyes wandering a tad, but his attention shifted to Florence. She was the lady of the hour and he couldn't stop staring much like a slackjawed yokel in the wake of her beauty.

'This is it. There is no turning back now. Your heart belongs to one woman and that is Florence. You will do your best to care for her and make her happy. It won't always be lollipops and unicorns, but you get the general idea.', Dan mused to himself. Being able to kiss her again made his knees buckle. Nothing else mattered, and he was certain that for a brief moment, he had felt gravity depart in her kiss. He knew such a thing was only in the confines of his overactive imagination. Any other idea of fantasies with himself, Hortense and Florence faded and only focused on Flo and him. This was what he intended it to be from the start and for the first time, felt truly happy and fulfilled. That bitterness that had been eating at him had slowly disappated. Sure he still had lists to complete, revenge to take, vendettas to fulfill but revolution seemed a far more ambitious and worthwhile than petty schemes such as this. But that didn't mean the 'list' was kaput. In fact, Flo mentioned she wanted to help him fulfill many of his 'get even' schemes in time. He was starting to love her more and more as the days turned into months and eventually years.

Epilogue 

After having been married to Florence for so long, Dan noticed his list had shrunk quite a bit. Flo also was a bit rounder than usual, but he knew what had caused that. The two of them had been savoring each others company nearly every night and she had finally become pregnant. He wondered what gender the baby was going to be and if he or she would resemble Flo or himself. None of that was important, seeing how elated she was or how she glowed every second of the day in that glorious maternal way. She was still a revolutionary, changing many of the idiotic laws of the past and causing the government to awaken from their over-spending ways. It was only a small alteration that was causing ripples throughout the entire state but she wasn't about to admit to beginning the transformation. Dan had helped in bouying her whenever naysayers tried to drag her down.

The time finally came for Flint to be born, and mainly, he resembled Flo with her straight ginger hair. He had Dan's steely blue eyes and button nose. Flint was healthy and _extremely_ loud in his cries until Flo patted his back and sang to him. Dan too, sang along with her, his voice surprisingly lyrical and calm. It was ironic that such a tender voice came from him, as well as his ability to soothe his own son. She just knew this man she had married had the capability to be a good father, even though parenthood would challenge them both at times.

As time passed, the list nearly grew non-existent. Flint, as his name sugguested, was a bit of a stoic child, but had a wily sense of humor as well as craftiness about him. He and Hortense's twins, Jerry Junior and Jessie, played almost every weekend. Dan quite enjoyed being a father, albeit Flint could be a skallywag at times. Flo, Dan and Flint had a fairly picturesque life together and Flint was growing to be quite the genius in his own right. He had surprised everyone, especially Chris, who was pretty sure that Flint would be a sociopath and misanthrope, but he kept all these pejoratives to himself. It was true that parenthood could change anyone, even someone as jaded as Dan had been.

The End


End file.
